Pam's Corner - Pam's Diary Highlights

August 23, 1986

Dear Diary,

Seeing as I'm pregnant with my third child, and D>J. is getting soooo big, I insisted to Danny for the hundredth time that he take some time out to tell D.J. about the birds and the bees. Of course, knowing him, I have been working things bit by bit, telling her bits and pieces here and there, because I knew he was too shy. He can't stand to see our little girls grow up, even though D.J. will start 4th grade this fall.

Well, once Stephanie had been put to bed, after he hemmed and hawed some more, I joined him. I was pleasantly surprised to see he'd at least gotten an anatomy book from the library, but every 30 seconds he seemed to be asking if D.J. had questions, or if it was too much for her. It was too much for him,t hat's what it was. So, I figured I had to help a little.

Danny was relieved that I had told D.J. about a number of issues before, and when she declared that she wanted to remain pure till marriage, it was all I could do to keep him from walking out of the room right then and there. "Oh, no you don't, silly," I told him. "It's wonderful that she feels that way, but you have to have a part in talking about these things, too."

So, Danny did okay, all things considered, but in the end, D.J. turned to me and said, "Mom, if Dad's this way now, what's he going to be like when I like boys?" Then, Danny asked nervously if she liked any boys yet. D.J. just nodded slowly and said, "Never mind, Mom, I think I know."

Diary, I think Danny remembers the eloping, the temptations he faced in college that he was able to overcome, but that he felt so guilty about having - he never did anything more than look at other women in college, but he would tell me after coming home how badly he felt. And, I think Danny wants to keep D.J. from getting too serious too fast with any boy. However, his way of doing it seems to be to keep totally quiet or be too controlling about the matter, and I don't think that's right, either.

D.J. is going to be starting on the road to womanhood, Diary, sooner than I like to think. She now knows pretty much everything about the changes her body will go through, and things like periods and the like. And, I just don't want Danny getting too worked up over it. I could have told D.J. everything and not even involved him. Part of me wanted to. But, sometimes part of being a woman is raising your husband as much as it is raising your children. At leaast with someone like Danny.

Oh, well, I've got a wonderful husband, all things considered. And, if he's a little too protective, that's okay, I guess. It's just my job to keep him from ignoring some things and also to keep him from getting too anxious about other things.

Hmmm, that's a part about boys I haven't shared with D.J. yet. But, I think over the next few months, I will. Goodness knows, between Danny and Jesse, I have my share of boys to help convince to be men.

Love,

Pam