Fan Fiction - Written by Martin van Dam - Season 10
Episode (31) 223 - Join The Clique
Jesse Katsopolis - Danny Tanner - Joey Gladstone - DJ Tanner-Hale - Stephanie Tanner - Michelle Tanner - Rebecca (Becky) Donaldson-Katsopolis - Nicky & Alex Katsopolis - Kimmy Gibbler - Steve Hale - Gia Mahan - Mark Tanner - Pam Hale (baby) - Comet (the dog)
------------------------------------------ INTRO ------------------------------------------------
We find Danny in the living room, when Michelle gets home....
Michelle: I don't believe this.
Danny: What's the matter honey?
Michelle: I was going to do a project for school with Denise, but last week we got this new girl, Janet, and now Denise is doing the project with her.
Danny: Well, why don't you ask somebody else, like Teddy or Derek ?
Danny: (Smiling) I believe you're a little jealous.
Michelle: No I'm not. I just want attention from my friends.
Danny: And who are you doing the project with ?
Michelle: With Heather. But nobody likes her.
Danny: Why not ?
Michelle: Because she's weird. But I guess I have to live with the fact she's my companion for the next week.
Michelle walks up the stairs, as DJ and Steve walk in through the front door, with Pam...
DJ: Hi dad.
Danny: Hi honey, welcome back. And there's my favorite grand daughter.
DJ: Well, she doesn't have much competition, does she.
Steve: So is there anything to eat in the house ? I'm hungry.
Danny: There is now. But I don't know about when you are finished.
Steve walks to the kitchen...
Danny: (Taking Pam from DJ) Hi baby. I'm your grandfather.
DJ: I'm glad to be home again. That hospital became very boring.
Danny: I know what you mean. When I was young, I broke my leg and I had to stay in the hospital for two days. The worst days of my life. There was this nurse Jutta, from Sweden, and she didn't allow anything.
DJ: Like what ?
DJ: But you just said you broke your leg.
Danny: Well, I guess that was exactly the reason why.
We find Joey in the kitchen, as Stephanie and Gia walk in...
Stephanie: Hi Joey.
Joey: Hi Steph, hi Gia.
Stephanie: What are you doing ?
Joey: I'm writing poems.
Stephanie: I didn't know you write them.
Joey: That's because I just started.
Gia: So what do you have already ?
Joey: Life is about learning... But what rhymes with Learning ?
Stephanie: What is the poem about ?
Joey: I don't know, I just want to put some useless stuff on paper, and see what it becomes.
Stephanie: Well, if it doesn't have to have a subject, you can rhyme everything. Like Learning and pearning.
Joey: What does pearning mean ?
Stephanie: I don't know. But it rhymes.
Then Mark walks in...
Mark: Hi guys. Does any of you know where they buy antique stuff ?
Stephanie: Maybe at the antiquary ?
Mark: That's a reasonable option. You see, I found this old painting at the attic of grandma's house. She says she thinks it's ugly, and she has never seen it before, so I want to sell it too.
Gia: What kind of painting is it ?
Stephanie: Maybe it's a Picasso.
Mark: I don't know what it is, but if it's a portrait, that guy really needed a face-lift.
Joey: Hm. What rhymes with Picasso ?
Gia: What about 'Let's eat some nacho's ?
Kimmy walks in...
Kimmy: Hello looser family.
Mark: Kimmy, are you aware that a famous painter, called Picasso has made a portrait of your face ? And I have to say, it's exactly you.
We find Michelle in her class room...
Teacher: Okay class, today you get the chance to work on your project.
Denise: Okay. Shall we start, Janet ?
Janet: Good idea.
Derek + Teddy: (With a dreaming look in their eyes) Oh yeah, let's get something started.
Michelle: Hi Heather.
Heather: Oh, hi Tanner.
Michelle: I believe we have to work together.
Heather: One thing, I don't like it. I prefer to work alone.
Michelle: But this time you can't.
Heather: I see no reason why not.
Michelle: Because Mrs. Brent told us to work together on this project.
Heather: So what ? We are teenagers, it's our holy job to be disobedient.
Michelle: Maybe for you, not for me.
Heather: I think you would understand me better if you know me better.
Michelle: You mean you wanna do something together ?
Heather: No, I meant nothing, just like I always do. But come by this afternoon. You need another image.
Michelle: Why, I like this image.
Heather: (Shaking her head) Hey, if you want to work together, you have to do it my way.
Heather walks away...
Teacher: heather, where are you going ?
Denise: And then she still wonders why she has to do her freshman's year four times.
We find DJ and Steve down in the garage, where they try to get Pam silent...
DJ: (Into the cradle) Hey, what's wrong ?
Steve: The baby is crying and keeps us awake.
DJ: Steve, it's 3 PM. We didn't even go to bed.
Steve: You see, that's my point.
DJ: (To the baby) What's wrong, honey ?
Steve: Well, let's see. Did we everything babies want when they are crying ?
DJ: Let's see. We have changed her, feed her, burped her, rocked her, tickled her, hold her.. Yes, we did everything possible.
Steve: There must be a way to et her silent. Can't we just pull out the batteries or something ?
DJ: Steve, it's a baby, not one of Joey's action figures.
Then Jesse and Danny walk down the stairs...
Jesse: DJ, can you please tell your child to make some less noise ? The neighbors just called to ask if it's our fire-alarm that's ringing.
DJ: I try, but she doesn't want to be silent.
Danny: Well, she will stop sometime. When she gets a sore throat.
Then Joey walks down the stairs...
Joey: I've got it!
Jesse: Al right Joseph. Our man!
Joey: Thanks Jess.
Danny: So, please go ahead.
Joey: You mean you really want to hear my poem ?
Jesse: No, we thought you found a way to get less decibels from the child.
Joey: Of course I do. Remember how we got Michelle quiet when she was little ?
Danny: I sure do. We always sang her a song when she didn't want to stop crying.
Steve: Well, what are you waiting for ?
Jesse: Lullaby baby, have a sweet night... (Pointing to Danny)
Danny: Uh.. Close your little eyes, and then sleep tight. (Pointing to Joey)
Joey: Lullaby baby, dreams come to you (Pointing to DJ)
DJ: (Confused) Just keep on dreaming, and they will come true (Pointing to Steve)
Steve: Lullaby baby, lay down and relax, so your daddy can get some nice snacks.
Jesse: Lullaby baby, this song has to end... (Pointing to Danny)
Danny: Because there's time enough for us to spend.
All: Lullaby baby, please close your eyes, so we can say to you (They pause for a few seconds) Goodnight!
The song is over, and the baby's quiet...
Steve: I didn't know this version of the song yet.
Jesse: Steve, that's called 'improvising'.
Steve: And I thought it was called 'lullaby baby'.
Then the baby starts crying again...
DJ: Oh no, we sang for nothing.
Joey: Guys, can I now please read my poem to you ?
Danny: Sure, but I hope we can hear you.
Joey: okay, here goes nothing. 'I was walking down the beach, when I saw a dollar, which I couldn't reach. So I walked towards the paper with the color green, I immediately wanted to buy some ice cream.'
Jesse: That's it ?
Steve: The end sounds good.
Joey: Well, I am still having some troubles finding the right rhymes. For example, what rhymes with 'There was an elephant in my bed' ?
Jesse: What about 'Stop writing poems, you knuckle-head'
DJ: (Whispering) Sst! Joey's poem got the baby a sleep.
They all walk up the stairs into the kitchen quietly...
We find Michelle at Heather's house...
Michelle: Why did you walk away this afternoon ?
Heather: Because school stinks. I understand that you want to work on the project now ?
Michelle: That's why I came here.
Heather: I am having some friends over now. We were just going away.
Michelle: To where ?
Michelle: Can I come ?
Heather: Sure. If you want to.
Two other girls walk out of another room...
Heather: Michelle, this are Carol and Macy.
Carol: Is she coming with us ?
Macy: What a dweep.
Heather: Hey, she wants to become friends with us.
Macy: Oh, how sweet. But does she know the rules ?
Heather: These are secret rules, so we will tell you when it's time. But now I need stuff.
Michelle: What kind of stuff ?
Heather: Good idea.
Macy: Prepare for a total make-over.
Later, we find Michelle, Heather, Carol and Macy near the supermarket, near a small alley...
Michelle: (wearing leather trousers, with her hair hanging loose over her head, and chains round her neck) What are we doing here ?
Macy: Now comes the good part.
Heather: Here, try some of this. (She gives Michelle some white powder)
Michelle: What is this ?
Macy: What do you think ? It's drugs. We call it 'dreamsnow'.
Michelle: And I call it 'no way'.
Macy: You can't go back now anymore, Michelle. You have to take it, if you want to join the clique.
Carol: 'Michelle', that sounds too soft. Let's call her 'Michael'.
Michelle: I'm sorry guys, but I won't do this.
Heather: Hey. You can't just walk away on us. You have to try it. You want to be our friend, don't you ?
Michelle looks confused, she doesn't know what to do...
We find Stephanie and Gia in the library...
Gia: Of all places in the whole wide world, I have to end up in a library!
Stephanie: And that only because we had such an interesting conversation about shoes.
Gia: It was better than Mr. Young's lecture about the North Pole.
Stephanie: but we will know everything about it after today. Our assignment: What consequences has the melting of the ice on the Poles ?
Gia: Like I care the sea-level raises, that only means more hot guys surfing!
Stephanie: Good point. We will certainly mention that in our essay.
Gia: I have a much better idea, let's go to the mall for a milkshake.
Stephanie: No, wait. I'm reading something interesting here. Ooh, you won't believe this.
Gia: What ?
Stephanie: When the ice melts, and the sea-level raises, that could mean more rain.
Gia: Oh my god. This is a serious problem. When it starts raining, that means the boys won't go out to surf, and they won't go to the beach either.
Stephanie: Right. So what are we going to do ?
Gia: We definitely have to go to the mall for milkshakes, now we still can see the cute boys.
Stephanie: That makes no sense, the boys will stay cute, we only will see them less than we do now.
Gia: Steph, this is a future emergency. I have to recover from this news. And going to the mall is the only way to do that.
Stephanie: Okay then.
We find Joey walking in the street...
Joey: (Imitating Popeye) Oh boy oh boy. Danny needs some groceries, so I am send to get the spinach. (With his own voice) I hate that my car broke down.
Then he sees Michelle and her new 'friends'...
Joey: Hi Michelle.
Michelle: (Stoned) Hello, Joseph. Want some fun stuff ?
Heather: Stuff, did you hear that girls, she said 'stuff'.
Heather, Carol and Macy laugh....
Joey: (Severe) Michelle, what are you doing ?
Michelle: Having fun!
Joey: Michelle, what have you done ?
Michelle: What do you think ? I have been using this.
Joey: What is that ?
Macy: (Laughing) Dope-head. That are we!
All girls laugh...
Joey: Michelle, how much...
Michelle: Joey, can you please leave ? You're spoiling the fun for us.
Joey: Okay, I'm leaving. But you're coming with me.
Michelle: Yeah, right!
Joey: Michelle, come here!
Michelle: Am I your dog ? Don't forget to buy me a bone.
Macy: Bone, that sounds like 'stoned'.
The girls laugh again...
Joey: Michelle, look at yourself, this is not you.
Michelle: How can I not be me ?
Joey: The Michelle I know wouldn't do something like this.
Michelle: But the old Michelle is boring.
Joey takes Michelle's arm and pulls her up...
Joey: Sorry Michelle, but I have to use the hard way to bring you home.
Michelle: Home ? I am home!
Heather: That's the spirit girl.
Michelle: You hear that ?
Joey: You are in big trouble, Michelle.
Michelle: And I thought you were on my site.
Joey: Not this time. I'm very disappointed in you. I thought you would never do something like this. Now come.
Joey pulls Michelle away from the girls...
At the Tanner house, in the kitchen, we find Joey and Michele walking in, as Becky and the twins are in the kitchen...
Alex: Michelle, why do you look so white ?
Nicky: Are you sick ?
Becky follows Joey and Michelle upstairs...
Nicky: I think something's wrong with Michelle.
Alex: Shall we follow them ?
Nicky + Alex: (Shaking their heads) Don't follow them.
Becky: What's going on ?
Joey: I catched Michelle while she was using drugs.
Becky: What ? Oh my god.
Michelle: Hey Beckarino! Are you having as much fun as me ?
Becky: I think we have to wait till Danny gets home. He will know what to do.
Michelle: You want to talk to my dad ? Please don't do that. He'll kill me. It was just a little bit. (Begging) Please ?
Joey: No Michelle, we can't keep silence about this to your dad. So you just stay in here till he gets home.
Becky: Michelle, why did you do it ?
Michelle: I don't know. But I want it again!
We find Stephanie and Gia at the street...
Gia: Oh my god.
Stephanie: What's wrong ?
Gia: I think Leonardo di Cabrio just passed here.
Stephanie: One: why, two: it's di Caprio.
Gia: Well, there are some girls lying on the ground. (She points to the other end of the street)
Stephanie: Oh my god, that doesn't look too good.
They cross the street...
Stephanie: This girl is conscious.
Gia: Okay, there is a number we have to dial now, but I forgot it.
Stephanie: Let me give you a hint. It's the name of a car boys like to drive.
Gia: You mean a Peugeot 205 ?
Stephanie: No, 911.
Stephanie gets her mobile phone and dials 911...
At the tanner house, we find Danny coming home, when Joey and Becky are waiting for him in the living room...
Danny: Hi guys. You won't believe what happened.
Becky: Neither will you.
Danny: You see, I came back to the studios to get my wallet, and then I met Ronny, the cameraman, and he...
Joey: Danny, there's something you have to know.
Becky: And I think you have to sit down for a moment.
Danny: Why ? What's wrong ?
Joey: Well, you see...
Danny: Is something wrong with one of the girls ?
Joey: I don't know how to tell you this, but uhm...
Becky: What he tries to say is that he...
Danny: Please, don't keep me ignorant about this...
Joey: If you insist. I catched Michelle when she was using uhm.. drugs.
Danny: (Laughing loud) Good one, Joey.
Becky: Danny, I think he is not joking this time. I saw her when they came home.
Danny: What ? So it is true ? My little girl used drugs ?
Danny: Where is she now ?
Danny: Thank you. (He stands up and walks up the stairs) Michelle!
In Michelle's room...
Danny: We have to have a serious talk, young lady.
Michelle: Dad, please. My head hurts.
Danny: Michelle, I'm gonna ask you this one time. Did you use drugs ?
Michelle: What do you like to hear ?
Danny: Michelle, answer the question, did you use drugs ?
Michelle: hey, you said you would only ask it once.
Danny: (Looking very angry) I guess that's a 'yes'. Michelle, I'm very disappointed in you.
Michelle: It wasn't much. Only one joint, and one spoon of cocaine. Nothing bad.
Danny: Nothing bad ? Michelle, drugs are bad! There are no drugs that are good for you. Do you know you have been playing with your life ?
Michelle: Hey, I'm still a live! (She starts singing) Staying a life....
Danny: Michelle, stop this. Was it that girl Heather that gave you the drugs ?
Danny: Okay, I forbid you to have contact with Heather for the rest of your life, and you are grounded for 2 months.
Michelle: 2 months ?
Danny: Yes, and we are not finished talking about this. I will get back to you when you're clean.
Michelle: I can take a shower if you like.
Then Stephanie walks in...
Stephanie: Can I come in ?
Danny: Can't it wait, Steph ? I'm having a very important conversation with Michelle.
Stephanie: I have something important to tell you too.
Danny: Okay, let's hear it.
Stephanie: Gia and I went to the mall, and then we found 3 girls lying on the ground. It turned out they had an overdose of bad drugs. It contained some poison.
Danny: Oh my god. Are you al right ?
Danny: She knows.
Stephanie: Well, she's in a coma. And the future doesn't look very bright for her. The chances that she will get out of this condition are ten percent.
Danny: Oh my god.
Michelle: And the other girls ?
Danny: Stephanie. I'm now gonna tell you something, that can't leave this house. I don't want you to tell this to any of your friends, understand ?
Stephanie: (Sitting down) Okay.
Danny: Steph, Michelle has also been using drugs. With those girls.
Stephanie: Michelle, are you crazy ? Don't you know the dangers of drugs ?
Michelle: I know it gives me a head ache.
Danny: Now lay down, Michelle. We will discuss this later.
Michelle lays down on her bed, Danny and Stephanie leave the room...
Danny: Steph, please don't tell this to anybody else. I will tell your uncle Jesse and DJ.
Stephanie: Okay. But Michelle ? I didn't expect this from her.
Danny: Me neither. But tell me, is there any danger for Michelle's health ?
Stephanie: I don't know.
Danny: I think I'd better call a doctor.
Later, we find Jesse, Danny, Joey, DJ and Stephanie in the living room, as Michelle walks down the stairs...
Michelle: Hi guys.
Joey: Oh look, our little junkie has arrived.
Michelle: I'm not a junkie.
Danny: But you did use drugs.
Michelle: They say you have to try everything once in your life.
Jesse: But there are limits to that rule, munchkin.
DJ: What came over you ?
Jesse: So you had to use it before you could join the clique ?
Stephanie: Michelle, if they only want to be friends because you do the same bad things they do, like smoking, or drinking, or doing drugs, they are no real friends.
DJ: You can't buy friendship.
Jesse: And if you believe that you're cool when you just do what they do, you're so wrong. But if you believe that you're cool when you just say 'no way', and you don't do it, you're so right. It's much cooler to do what you think is best, than to do what the group thinks is best.
Michelle: That makes no sense to me.
Danny: Michelle, honey, what if Heather had told you to jump in front of a train, just to be her friend, would you have done it ?
Michelle: Of course not, but that really doesn't have any similarities with using some cocaine.
Joey: Oh yes it does.
Jesse: Don't you see how lucky you've been ?
Michelle: I was lucky ?
Michelle: So I guess I was lucky.
That night we find Michelle in her bedroom, when Joey walks in...
Joey: Are you sleeping ?
Michelle: Not yet. But I can do that a lot the next 2 months.
Joey: Michelle, I want you to know that I hope you're not mad at me.
Michelle: Why should I ?
Joey: Well, I did threat you like a little baby.
Michelle: Maybe you did, but I deserved it. I think I owe you a big thank you. If you didn't catch me, who knows what would have happened ? I could have been lying in some gutter now. Half death, or maybe worse, only half alive.
Joey: But please promise me one thin. Never do this again. You really scared me, you know. If even you would do that...
Michelle: I promise. But can we now please stop the discussion ?
Joey: Okay. But I think we will get plenty of moments to remind you of this. Specially the next 2 months.
Michelle: That's a long time. I hope I won't get bored.
Joey: Well, just know you can always help me with my poetry, or my work. You know, when I am practicing my comedy-act or my Woodchuck thing for the show, you can always drop in.
Joey and Michelle hug...
The next morning, we find Danny walking down the stairs into the kitchen, wearing his pyama's, when he sees the table, all set...
Danny: Wow, what is this ?
Michelle walks in from the living room...
Michelle: Oh no, you spoiled the surprise. I wasn't finished yet.
Danny: You did all this ?
Steve runs up the stairs from the garage...
Steve: Yum! Am I smelling bacon and eggs, ham, toast and peanut butter ?
Steve: I have very sensitive senses when it concerns food.
Danny: That's no secret.
Joey and the twins walk down the stairs...
Joey: Oh great! A nice meal before we watch the Jetsons.
Alex: Al right!
Nicky: Double al right!
Steve: Triple al right!
Michelle: Steve, don't over do it.
Danny: Well, it's very nice of you Michelle, to do this.
Michelle: And you know what ? I did it, because I wanted it.
Danny: Now that's the Michelle I know.
At Michelle's school....
Teacher: Okay class, today is the day for your presentations of the project. Now let's begin with Denise and Janet.
Denise and Janet walk to the front of the class...
Denise: Like we all were supposed to do, we used the subject 'Friendship' Now what is friendship ?
Janet: Friendship is doing everything for each other, when the other asks you, because you are friends.
Denise: And you can get a good friendship by trying to adapt to each other.
Janet: So find out what other people like, and you can be friends.
Denise: Thank you for your attention.
Teacher: Okay, girls, you can sit down now.
Janet: What is our grade ?
Teacher: You got a B.
Denise + Janet: Al right.
Teacher: Then now it's time for...
Michelle: (Interrupting) Can I go now ?
The teacher nods...
Michelle: I don't understand why you gave them a B. What they said is not true! As you know, heather can't be here today to do this presentation with me, but I can do this alone. You see, real friends care about each other, and yes, you do things for each other, but only because you want to, and not because you have to. You know, there are limits. You can't do anything to become friends. A real friendship come from the heart, and not from how somebody looks. And not from which class you are, neither it depends from where you come from, or how your past looks. No, it's about accepting each other the way you are, and caring about each other because of who you are. It's not some kind of game, you can't be a good friend because somebody tells you, it has to grow. And no matter what anybody says, if you can be an individual, in stead of part of a group, like the Borg on Star Trek, you are strong. And that's what a real friendship is all about. Two individuals who care about each other, and not two elements of something bigger, like a group, who think they care about each other, but in fact they only care about themselves, and being popular. But it's only real if you can be yourself.
Michelle stops, the whole class keeps silent...
Derek: Michelle, what a sophisticated monologue you just had.
Teacher: Michelle, that was wonderful. That was not something you had studied on for weeks, that was something that came directly from the heart. I don't think anybody could say anything that I as important as you just did.
Janet: Do you guys really believe her ? Look what became of me.
Michelle: Janet, get a life. Do you really think you are cool because you inflate your breasts with a bicycle-pump every night ?
Michelle: Then you are dumber than I thought, and you didn't understand anything of what I just said.
Denise: Michelle is right!
Denise: Michelle, I'm sorry I didn't spend much time with you lately. Can you forgive me ?
Teddy: I'm sorry too.
Derek: I agree with them.
Michelle: Me too. Of course I can forgive you, friends always can.
The four kids hug...
Janet: hey, what about me ?
Denise: And don't be so selfish.
Janet: I'm not selfish, I'm very important!
Michelle, Denise, Teddy and Derek talk, and sit down. Janet starts crying and runs away....
Michelle: I'm glad I found my real friends back.
Full House - The new stories
Michelle has to do a project for school, with Heather, a girl from her class. Her old friends are only interested in a new girl, Janet. Heather wants to be Michelle's friend, but she has a price for that. Joey, who tries writing poems, catches Michelle when she has crossed the border line.