Fan Fiction - Written by Martin van Dam - Season 10
Episode (42) 234 - Ready To Date
Jesse Katsopolis - Danny Tanner - Joey Gladstone - DJ Tanner-Hale - Stephanie Tanner - Michelle Tanner - Rebecca (Becky) Donaldson-Katsopolis - Nicky & Alex Katsopolis - Kimmy Gibbler - Steve Hale - Gia Mahan - Mark Tanner - Pam Hale (baby) - Comet (the dog)
We find the twins and Pam in the living room with Comet...
Nicky: Pam, we're gonna play a fun game.
Alex: You're getting a free doggy ride.
Comet, who is sleeping, suddenly puts his head up...
Alex: Don't worry Comet, you won't feel anything.
The twins put Pam on Comet's back...
Nicky: Start riding, Pam!
Comet walks away with Pam on his back, hold by Alex...
Alex: isn't this fun ?
Steve walks into the room...
Steve: Woa, what's happening here ?
Steve: Take it easy boys, or next month she want to have her own horse.
Steve walks away....
We find Danny and DJ in the living room with Pam...
DJ: I don't believe that Pam can eat so much. Where does she keep it ?
Danny: Well, sometimes babies are very hungry. Especially for sweet things.
DJ: But Pam just eats anything, I wonder who she got it from.
Steve walks in with an apple in his hand...
Steve: I'm gonna buy some cd's. Anyone needs something ?
Steve: Okay. Well, then I guess I'll see you later. And by the way, Mr. Tanner, do you know we are out of doughnuts ?
Danny: This morning I bought a family pack.
Steve: And my entrails family is very grateful for that.
Steve walks out of the door, as Michelle walks in...
Michelle: Hi dad, hi DJ.
Danny: Hi honey, how was your day at school ?
Michelle: Great. David Palmer asked me out on a date tonight.
Danny: A date ?
DJ: Congratulations Michelle, your first date.
Danny: No way. Michelle, you're not ready for that yet.
Michelle: But dad, I already said I will meet him at seven at the Smash Club.
Danny: Then just call him and say you can't make it.
Michelle: Thanks for nothing dad. (She walks up the stairs)
Danny: Deej, I know what you're trying to do now, but she's not ready for a date.
Up the attic...
Jesse: (Singing) I'm singing, I'm singing but I don't know what about. Singing without a song.
Becky walks into the attic living room...
Becky: Honey, please stop singing.
Jesse: What ? But I was really onto something here.
Becky: Onto what ? A broken window ?
Jesse: You don't mean the glass will break through my voice, do you ?
The twins run up the attic...
Nicky: Guess what ?
Jesse: What ?
Becky: Let me guess. Your uncle Danny wants you to clean behind the fridge.
Alex: No, it's much more important.
Nicky: We have to watch the school hamster.
Jesse: What ? You have to watch a mouse alike animal ?
Alex: (Taking the hamster out of his bag) Tommy is no mouse, he's a cute hamster.
Becky: I'm not sure your uncle Danny is pleased with this.
Jesse: I'm not sure if I'm pleased with this.
Nicky: Can we keep him for the weekend ? Please ?
Becky: Okay, but don't let him escape.
Alex: Like we would do that.
We find Michelle in her room, as Stephanie walks in...
Stephanie: Michelle, can I borrow your... (She sees Michelle sitting on her bed, holding her pillow, while she's crying) Michelle, what's wrong ?
Stephanie: Michelle, you can tell me whatever you want and I'll take it, but you don't cry about nothing.
Michelle: I do.
Stephanie: (Sits down next to Michelle and puts her arm around her) Hey, what's wrong ?
Michelle: I had a date with a very cute boy, and dad has forbidden me to go.
Stephanie: It's that time again ? I know exactly how you feel. He always tried to keep me from dating too.
Michelle: How did you stop that ?
Michelle: I think that's a little hard for me to do on a short notice. I'm only 13.
Stephanie: Well, then we have to use another method to convince dad that you're ready to date.
Michelle: What ?
Stephanie: I think I know something. Wait here, I'll be right back.
Stephanie walks out of the room...
We find Jesse in the kitchen playing his guitar and singing...
Jesse: (Singing) La la la. La la la.
Joey walks in from the living room...
Joey: Jess, you sound terrible.
Jesse: I know. I want to write a new song, but I don't seem to have any inspiration.
Joey: maybe this inspires you. (Singing) Boom shakalaka Boom shakalaka Boom Boom. Party dude!
Jesse: (Smiling) Thanks Joseph, now I know it can be worse than I do.
Kimmy walks in...
Jesse: She speaks French. Gee, I hope she's practicing to move there.
Joey: (With a French accent) Ooh, That would really light up my day.
Kimmy: No, Cartoon guy. I just ate some French cheese.
Jesse: That explains the smell.
DJ walks in...
DJ: Hi Kimmy.
Kimmy: Deej, can I ask you something ?
Kimmy: Two what ?
We find Stephanie, Michelle and Gia in Michelle's room...
Stephanie: Okay Michelle, get ready for operation convince dad.
Gia: And what do I have to do with that ?
Michelle: That's your plan ? I'm doomed to die dateless.
Gia: You could say you're going out with friends. I do that every time I go out.
Stephanie: Gia, that is because you are going out with friends.
Gia: Oh yeah.
Danny walks in...
Danny: You wanted to speak to me ?
Stephanie: We sure do.
Michelle: We think it's unfair not to let me go on a date.
Danny: Do you. Steph, Gia, can I speak to Michelle alone ?
Stephanie: Sure, go ahead. We'll be quiet.
Danny: Could you please leave the room ?
Stephanie: You are sending us away ? How rude! Come Gia.
Stephanie and Gia leave the room...
Danny: Michelle, I know you want to date, but I don't think you're ready yet.
Michelle: How can you know ? Can you read my mind ?
Danny: No. But I'm your father, I know.
Michelle: No you don't. You just don't let me go because you still want me to be your little girl. But I'm 13 years old dad, not five.
Danny: I won't change my mind Michelle. (He walks away)
We find Nicky and Alex up the attic with Tommy...
Nicky: Watching the hamster is easy.
Alex: Yeah, we just have to watch.
DJ walks up the stairs...
DJ: Hi boys, dinner is ready. (She sees the hamster) Oh my god. What's that ?
Nicky: That's Tommy, our school hamster.
Alex: We have to watch him.
DJ: Oh, right. Boys, when did you last feed him ?
Nicky + Alex: Feed him ?
DJ: (Nodding) Fed him. He looks kind of hungry to me.
Alex: How can you tell ?
DJ: He's almost lying on his back with his eyes closed.
Nicky: We thought he was doing some tricks.
DJ: I think you should give him some water and food quickly.
Alex: We do ?
Nicky: But we only had to watch him.
Becky walks up the stairs...
Becky: Boys, are you coming ?
Nicky: Mummy, did you know that watching a hamster means we also have to feed him ?
Becky: Of course I do. Uh, boys, you did give him something to eat, did you ?
Nicky: Uh, we gave him food today.
Alex: This morning at school.
Becky: Oh boy.
DJ: Well boys, I guess you better get his food.
Nicky: We can't.
Alex: It's still at school.
We find Stephanie and Michelle in Michelle's room...
Michelle: Half past six. I think I can forget about David.
Stephanie: Hold it, Michelle. There's one last chance. Put on your coat, we're going to the Smash Club.
Stephanie: Come with me, I've got the perfect plan.
They walk down the stairs into the living room...
Stephanie: Bye dad.
Danny: Bye Steph.
Michelle: Bye dad.
Danny: Bye Michel... Where are you going ?
Danny: Well, isn't there a slight chance that you are trying to go to your appointment this way ?
Stephanie: Dad, we are going to see a band that we heard is good.
Danny: Okay. Have fun.
Michelle: We will. Bye dad.
The girls leave the house...
Michelle: It worked!
Stephanie: I told you I had a perfect plan.
Michelle: Thanks, I'll see you later.
Stephanie: Freeze! Dad thinks we're going together, so we are going together.
They walk away...
We find Jesse in the Smash Club behind the bar when Mark walks in...
Mark: Good evening.
Jesse: Hi Mark. What brings you here ?
Jesse: let me see that. (He reads the paper) What ? The band broke up twenty minutes ago ? Why didn't they call me ?
Mark: Well, you won't get any phone calls right now.
Jesse: Why not ?
Mark: Because I connected your phone to my portable. I'm expecting a phone call and that person doesn't want to call mobile phones for some reason, but in case I wasn't here I connected your phone.
Jesse: Couldn't you just ask before you did that ?
Jesse: Gee, I wonder why.
Mark: Well, I did that too, but after some minutes I realized that I was calling myself.
Jesse: That was stupid.
Mark: Hey, it was a late night yesterday.
Stephanie and Michelle walk in...
Stephanie: Hi. Is the band in yet ? I want to have some autographs.
Jesse: They aren't even famous yet.
Stephanie: But one day they will be and then that autograph is worth big bucks.
Mark: Well, that might work.
Stephanie: You see, Mark agrees with me.
Mark: Well, I meant, if you can get the band together again.
Michelle: They broke up ? Oh nuts.
We find the twins up the attic...
Nicky: Tommy, we have some food for you.
Alex: I hope you like a peanut butter sandwich, we don't have anything else.
Nicky: (Watching the cage) Oh oh.
Alex: Double oh oh.
Becky walks out of the attic bathroom...
Becky: What's wrong, boys ?
Nicky: Well, I think we don't have to feed Tommy again.
Alex: I think he's looking for his own food.
The twins point at the cage, which is empty...
Nicky: Tommy escaped.
Alex: What do we do now ?
We find Becky walking into the kitchen where Danny is running around...
Becky: Danny, we got a problem.
Danny: I know. I just saw a mouse running through the kitchen. My kitchen, the one I clean every hour of the day.
Joey walks in from the living room...
Joey: Danny, stop the chase! Please don't harm the mouse.
Danny: Joey, that thing is...
Becky: Not a mouse, it's a hamster. The boys brought it home from school to watch it, and it kind of escaped.
Joey: Uh, Danny, did you hire a cat ?
Danny: No, why ?
Joey: Well, in the words of the world famous Tweety: 'I think I taw a putty cat.'
Danny: Where ?
Becky: Oh my god.
They run into the living room, where Steve is...
Steve: Oh no. Fluffy almost caught the mouse.
Joey: (Imitating Tweety again) I did taw a putty cat.
A cat is running through the living room, as DJ and Comet walk in...
Danny: DJ, stay out!
Comet sees the cat, barks and starts running after the cat...
Danny: Oh my god.
DJ: When did we get a cat ?
Steve: It's not ours. Fluffy is from the neighbors.
Danny: No Comet, not my grandmother's china!
Comet bumps onto a table, and a vase drops on the ground and breaks...
Steve: I think I'm gonna get something to eat.
Danny: You better do that, it will be your last meal.
Steve runs into the kitchen...
Joey: (Holding the cat) I better take this one back to the neighbors.
We find the twins up that attic, as Becky walks up...
Becky: Boys, we need to talk.
Nicky: is something wrong with Tommy ?
Alex: What do you mean ?
Nicky: But where is he now ?
Becky: We don't know. But don't worry, he'll be found sooner or later. I hope.
In the Smash Club...
Stephanie: Well Michelle, it's eight thirty, where is your lover ?
Michelle: I wish I knew.
Jesse walks towards the girls..
Jesse: Michelle, there's somebody who asked for you at the door.
Michelle: Is it a boy ?
Jesse: I'm afraid so.
Michelle walks to the door...
Stephanie: That will be her date I guess.
Jesse: I hope not.
Stephanie: Why ?
Michelle walks towards them with a boy, wearing a leather jacket and with an earring in his right ear, and a bald head....
Michelle: Stephanie, uncle Jesse, meet David.
Stephanie: Oh my god. My sister is dating a Hells Angel.
Jesse: A boy like me at that age.
Michelle: Isn't he cute ?
Stephanie: Michelle, can I have a word with you ? (She pulls Michelle at her arm)
Michelle: What ?
Stephanie: Michelle, do you know what dad will say when he sees him ?
Michelle: Usually he is not dressed like this.
Stephanie: But he is now.
Michelle: Yeah, well, he made a bet with his friends that he dared to come here dressed like this. Happy now ?
Stephanie: Fine with me, but when dad knows about this...
Danny suddenly appears in front of the girls...
Danny: If I know about what ?
Stephanie: Dad, what brings you here ?
Michelle: The band cancelled, they have split up.
Danny: Michelle, I think you're only here because of that boy.
Michelle: What boy ?
David: Hey Michelle, babe, wanna dance ?
Danny: Oh my god. Michelle, you're going home with me right now.
Danny and Michelle leave...
Stephanie: (Smiles at David) Strange isn't it, how expected things can happen unexpected.
We find Nicky and Alex in the kitchen...
Nicky: What do we tell the class Monday ?
Alex: Tommy ran away ?
Joey: Hey boys, any sign of Tommy yet ?
Nicky: Not even a postcard.
Joey: Well, if you want to find him, you have to look at places where he fits.
Alex: That could be anywhere in the house.
Nicky: He's even smaller than Kimmy's brain.
Alex: And everybody knows that is small.
Joey: Boys, we're gonna make a hamster trap.
Nicky: We don't wanna kill him.
Joey: We don't need to. I saw Tom using this to catch Jerry once. We need a box, a stick, and something that Tommy likes to eat.
We find Danny and Michelle entering the living room...
Michelle: I think it's very unfair.
Danny: Michelle, listen to me. One, you weren't allowed to go on a date tonight. Two, that boy was dressed like a criminal.
Michelle: Dad, he wasn't wearing any other clothes than uncle Jesse used to wear.
Danny: That doesn't matter here.
Michelle: Yes it does. To me anyway.
Danny: There's a big difference between your uncle Jesse and that boy.
Michelle: Yeah, like what ?
Danny: Your uncle Jesse was your mother's brother, and he was always trying to get some women, this boy is no difference. But with your uncle Jesse, I didn't know those women, but you are my daughter.
Michelle: So you mean you are doing this to protect me ?
Danny: Yes. You are my last child, but maybe I should let go some more.
Michelle: Dad, David is not the person you saw tonight.
Danny: Michelle, love makes you see things more beautiful than they really are. And if that David would really be different than he looked tonight, than I'm gonna bake chocolate cookies, while dancing the Swan lake.
The doorbell rings. Danny opens the door and David is standing in front of him wearing regular clothes....
Danny: Can I help you ?
Michelle: I told you so.
David: Mr. Tanner, do you mind if I take Michelle out on a date tomorrow ?
Danny: (Looking at Michelle, who looks begging at him, and sighs) Sure.
David: Thank you sir. Michelle, I'll see you tomorrow. Same time, same place ?
Michelle: You got it Dave!
Michelle: Thank you dad.
Danny: Michelle. Maybe you're ready to date now, but it's hard for me to let you go. Please, be careful, not all boys are as nice as David turned out to be.
Michelle: I know dad.
Danny: Well, then I guess I'll go find a tutu and heat up the oven.
Danny walks away...
The next morning we find Jesse in the Smash Club playing his guitar (again)....
Jesse: (Singing) I don't know what to sing about, I wanna scream I wanna shout....
Mark walks in...
Mark: Oh my god, Becky was right. You really stink.
Jesse: Thanks for the support.
Mark: Anytime. Maybe I can help.
Jesse: How ? Want to buy me some ideas ?
Mark: No, even better. Listen. Right after my dad died, I wrote a song. But after I sang it once, I decided I would never do it again, because of all the broken mirrors and windows. But it would mean a lot to me, if you, part of my new family, would sing it.
Jesse: Can I see it ?
Mark: Sure. (He gives Jesse a piece of paper)
Jesse: (Reading) Not bad. Not bad at all. Let's try it.
Mark: (Walking to a keyboard and playing) This is the melody I had in mind.
We find the twins running down the stairs into the living room...
Nicky: Let's see the trap.
The boys walk to the trap, where they find Kimmy stuck with her hand...
Kimmy: Hey, can you help me ? I wanted to eat that cookie and now my hand is stuck.
Alex: You can just lift that box.
Kimmy: I can ? (She tries to lift her hand, and the box moves) Hey, I can! Why didn't I think of that my self ?
Nicky: That's an easy one. You don't have anything to do the thinking with.
DJ: Kimmy, what are you doing here ?
DJ: You have one in your room.
Kimmy: I know, but it was tuned in on channel 1, and the show I wanna see is one channel 2.
DJ: Oh. Well, you could have used the remote.
Alex: She did, and she turned her brain off with it.
Kimmy: I'm leaving now, I think there's a bad attitude in this house.
Nicky: And it will be gone when you're away.
DJ: Boys, are you starting to tease Kimmy too ?
DJ walks back into the kitchen...
Nicky: But still no sign of Tommy.
Alex: Thanks to Kimmy.
The twins walk up the stairs. Then the hamster walks through the screen and disappears again...
That night we find Michelle and David in the Smash club...
David: I hope they have a good band tonight.
Michelle: My cousin Mark is taking care of the music here.
David: You have family working here ?
Danny walks towards them...
Danny: Having a good time ?
Michelle: Yes dad.
Danny: Are you sure ?
Michelle: Yes, I just told you I am.
Danny: Want to drink something ? Cola, 7up, lemonade, milk ?
Danny: Oh, I'll go find her then. (He walks away)
Michelle: Sorry for that.
David: My mom is just like that. She even wanted me to be home at eight.
Michelle starts giggling...
David: And my dad said I should wear a tuxedo.
Michelle starts laughing out loud, as Danny finds Stephanie...
Danny: You were looking for me ?
Danny: But Michelle told me that...
Stephanie: (Sees Michelle who looks at Stephanie and signals her to talk on to Danny) Oh yeah, now I remember. Dad, can we have a cow ?
Danny: A cow ?
Stephanie: Yeah, maybe that stops Joey drinking out of the carton. I mean, the cow gives fresh milk.
Danny: I don't think it will be a pretty picture seeing Joey drink out of the cow. And where
would the cow have to live ? (He looks at Michelle, who is kissing David) Or were you just distracting me for Michelle ?
Stephanie: But father, like I would do that.
Danny: I better go there before their lips are stuck together.
Stephanie: dad, as your middle age daughter, I forbid you to go there. You have to let her go once. And now you can watch her from a distance, what fi she was going to an underground club with men in black jackets and with tattoos on every part of their body saying 'I love my mummy', just because you wouldn't give her the chance to explore the miracle of love ?
Mark walks by and just heard the last words...
Mark: Woa, that's a great title for a song. The miracle of love. Cool. (He walks away)
Danny: I can't believe this. DJ is married and has her own baby. Michelle started dating, and you sound so mature. Things go fast. Too fast for me.
Stephanie: I understand it's hard for you to let us go, but some day you have to.
Danny: I know. You know, honey. What you just said. I'm sure that's exactly what your mother would have said if she was still alive.
In the Tanner house, we find Joey, Becky and the twins...
Becky: Boys, can't you just forget about the hamster ?
Joey: (Almost crying) How heroic.
Becky: Boys, it's a hamster. There are worse things than this that could happen.
Nicky: Like what ?
Becky: Well, you could get an accident, your school could burn down.
Alex: What's the bad part of that ?
Becky: Okay, bad example. But boys, life goes on, with or without Tommy. And now we have to go. Your dad wants us at the Smash Club at ten. He told me he has a surprise.
They want to leave the house. But then Nicky sees something...
The boys walk towards the hamster, which walks away. But it doesn't get far, because Nicky jumps and catches it....
Nicky: I've got him!
Becky: Put him back in his cage then.
The twins run up the stairs with the hamster...
Joey: I'm glad that's over.
In the Smash Club...
Jesse: (To Mark) have you seen Becky or the twins yet ?
Mark: No, but relax, they will be here.
Jesse: I'll wait for them.
Mark: What are you so nervous about ? I thought you'd be used to perform a song by now. And you sound great!
Jesse: Yeah, I know. And it's not a bad song either. Thanks for the help.
Mark: No, thank you for playing it. It means a lot to me.
Jesse: I'm gonna check if the band is ready. (He walks away)
Stephanie: Hey Mark, do you know what that big surprise is, uncle Jesse was talking about ?
Mark: But Stephanie, like I would tell you a secret. Just be patient and wait.
Stephanie: Come on. Please ?
Joey, Becky and the twins enter..
Mark: Oh great, you're here. (He walks backstage, where Jesse and the band are) Jesse, they are here.
Jesse: Okay. We're ready to rock.
Mark walks up the stage...
Mark: Okay, can I have your attention please. He's back in business! With a great new song, the Smash club is proud to present Hot Daddy and the Munkey Puppets, with their new song, 'Memories'.
Mark leaves the stage, as Jesse and the band enter. The crowd cheers...
Jesse: Thanks you. Al right, let's rock!
The band starts playing...
There was a time of you and me together, Sharing all the good times, joy and pain.
But now the time has come, for goodbye to those days, But I will remember you always.
And all that's left are memories, Memories of better times, Memories of you and me together.
And all that's left are memories, Memories of a lifetime you and me, Memories that keep us together.
I still remember the day we met, That beautiful day, how could I forget, The start of a beautiful time,
I was your friend, and you were mine. With all the love and fun we shared, But when I call you now, you're not there.
And all that's left are memories, Memories of better times. Memories of being together, you and me.
And all that's left are memories, Memories of a lifetime you and me, Memories that keep us together.
And now we are falling apart, Saying goodbye is so hard,
And all we've ever said and done, I will think of it when you are gone.
And all that's left are memories, Memories of better times. Memories of being together, you and me. And all that's left are memories, Memories of a lifetime you and me, Memories that keep us together.
The band stops playing, as the crowd cheers and calls 'We want more, we want more'
Becky: I knew he could do it.
Mark: Sure he could. (Whispering) This one was for you, dad.
Full House - The new stories
Michelle wants to go on a date with David, but Danny is not very happy about this. The twins have to watch the school hamster, and the discover it's not easy. Jesse wants to write a new song, but has no inspiration. Then Mark makes him an offer.