Full House Scripts - Season 4

Episode 069 * Greek Week


We find Jesse, DJ, Stephanie and Michelle in the living room
Jesse: Ok girls, now remember. When my grandparents step of the plane, we say 'Welcome to America' in Greek. Ok, now what are we going to say?
DJ + Stephanie: Welcome to America in Greek.
Jesse: Alright now that we got that out of our system let's try ir for real like we practised. Ready ...
Jesse + DJ + Stephanie: Kallos ertarte sten ameriky.
Jesse: Very good. Come on Michelle. Kallos ertarte sten ameriky.
Michelle: Are you nuts!
Jesse: Alright, let's just practice giving them a kiss, shall we?
Michelle walks towards Jesse and kisses him...

Jesse: C'mon guys! Hurry up! Their plane is landing soon!
Danny: Jesse the airport just called, their plane landed early!
(Somone knocks at the door)
Jesse: What do you mean their plane landed early?
Joey: Well the wheels pop out, the attendant comes on and says 'fasten your seatbelts'
Jesse: I know that!
(Jesse opens the door and sees Papouli and Yaya Gina so he slams it)
Jesse: Oh my god they're here! Now everyone get ready!
(Everyone just stands there))
Jesse: Perfect!
(Jesse opens the door))
Papouli: What kind of welcome is..
All: Kallos ertarte sten ameriky
Papouli: Now that's more like it!
Gina: Oh Jesse! My Jesse!
(She starts kissing him on each cheek over and over)
Jesse: Uh Papouli...? Help!
Papouli: Gina! Gina! You still have much more people to meet!
Jesse: That's right, uh this is the father of your great grandchildren, Danny Tanner.
(Danny takes a Greek dictionary)
Danny: My sovraco...is your sovraco.
Papouli: Thank you, but we brought our own underwear!
Danny: I'll get back to you on that
(Gina starts to kiss him)
Papouli: Who is this blonde one?
Stephanie: That's Joey! Show him your bulwinkle!
Joey: (in bulwinkle voice) Well I sure hope you get american cartoons... otherwise I'd be making some first impression!
Papouli: We have funny man like Joey in Greece. Nikos The Village Idiot! Jesse! Your cousin has made you the godfather of his little girl Melina!
(Melina enters (Mary-Kate olsen). Michelle and Melina look at eachother in disbelief)
Michelle: Hey that's my face!
Melina: Moocha moo!
Joey: Some family resemblence.
Jesse: I'd say.
Michelle: C'mon, I'll show you my room...you're VERY pretty!
(Michelle and Melina leave)
Stephanie: Did you bring anyone that looks like me?
Gina: No...but we did bring Sylvio! Oh Sylvio! Come here!
(Sylvio enters and D.J and Sylvio stare at eachother dreamily)
Sylvio: I see picture of you in house of your great grandfather. I must say you are even more beautiful in person.
DJ: Oh Mylanta! Papouli, are we related?
Papouli: No!
DJ: Yes! C'mon, I'll show you my room.
(D.J and Sylvio leave)
Danny: Steph, why don't you show Yaya Gina your room?
Stephanie: Okay, I'll keep an eye on 'em.
Danny: Good girl, don't ever grow up.
(Stephanie and Gina leave)
Danny: C'mon, I'll show you my enfierno.
Papouli: You have a volcano in the kitchen?
(Danny and Papouli leave)
Jesse: Sylvio, didn't he have an older sister? What was her name?
(Elena enters)
Elena: Elena!
Jesse: Yeah Elena. Elena!?
Elena: Oh Jesse it's so good to see you again!
(she hugs him and kisses him as Becky comes in)
Jesse: Have Mer..
(Becky taps him on the shoulder)
Jesse: Have Mercedes gone to Greece yet?
Becky: Who's this?
Jesse: This is little Elena... and I haven't seen you since I was 14, and you were... little!
Elena: Who's that?
(Jesse tries to remember)
Jesse: This is....uh.......
Becky: Big Becky!
Jesse: Big Becky! This is big Becky.
Elena: They told me you were not married.
Jesse: Oh no, we're not married...she's just my....uh......
Jesse: GIRLFRIEND! She's my girlfriend...and we're all friends meeting friends..I'm sure we're going to have a great time together right?
Elena: Right.
Becky: Yeah right.

(In Stephanie and D.J's room...)
(Yaya Gina is teaching her a Greek dance)
Stephanie: Wow! The Greek dance is so cool! Want me to teach you an American dance? Wanna vogue? Strike a pose!
(She poses as Danny enters)
Danny: Hey have you guys seen--what are you doing?
Stephanie: Voguing!
Danny: Have you guys seen D.J?
Stephanie: She went to the mall with Sylvio.
Danny: What?! Yaya
Gina: No need to worry...Sylvio fine boy! Much like Jesse when he was younger!
(Danny leaves immediately)

(The backyard, it's nighttime and D.J and Sylvio cam back from the mall)
Sylvio: I had a great time tonight.
DJ: Me too.
Sylvio: I've never tasted a slurpee, how did I do?
DJ: Great! You slurped at just the right speed.
Sylvio: I was very nervous.
(They sit down)
DJ: Aren't the stars beautiful?
Sylvio: The most beautiful stars, are in your eyes.
(They kiss)
(Danny comes out)
Danny: Okay Comet time for your walk!
DJ: Dad were you spying on us?
Danny: No! If I was spying I would've been out here way before all that star talk!
Sylvio: Mr. Tanner..your daughter is the most beautiful woman in the world.
Danny: She's ok. Why don't you go back into your cage, I mean...your room. It's been a long flight.

Elena: More Musaka, Jesse?
Becky: Jess, give it a rest huh? You've been eating for 2 hours!
Elena: Honey?
Jesse: Yes dear?
Elena: No, I mean do you want honey on your bachlava?
Jesse: Heh...of course I do..I mean...what's bachlava without honey? Right honey?
Becky: Jesse...HONEY. This woman didn't fly 12,000 miles to stuff your face full of musaka! Now what's going on between you two?
Jesse: Becky, nothing is! You know how I feel about ya.. I promise nothing is ever going to come between us.
(Elena places Bachlava in between them)
Elena: Bachlava!

(In Michelle's room, Melina and Michelle are looking in the mirror)
Michelle: I see it but I don't believe it.
(Joey enters)
Joey: Hey twinsters. How's it going?
Michelle: Joey, why do we look alike?
Joey: Well, it's because you're cousins. (Singing) Identical cousins....they act alike, they walk alike, at times they even talk alike..Identical cousins are two of a kind!
Melina: Nikos!
(Jesse comes down with Becky into the kitchen where Danny and Elena are)
Jesse: Danny have you seen my dress shirt?
Danny: Jesse, do I look like your mother? ......It's in the hamper.
Elena: Here it is. I'll iron it for you.
Becky: Oh no, I can do that..after all you're here on vacation.
(Becky grabs the shirt)
Jesse: Becky are you sure? I mean..I've never actually SEEN you iron.
Becky: Oh I live to iron! All I need is one of those ironing tables.
Jesse: Sweetheart, that's ironing BOARD.
Becky: Heheheh...shut up!
(Joey enters with Michelle and Melina dressed alike)
Joey: Check this out! Try to tell 'em apart!
Michelle: You'll never guess daddy!
Danny: Ohhh this is a toughie, but I bet that the real Michelle is the one that just called me Daddy. And you are Melina.
Michelle: Aw nuts.
Melina: Aw hoo..
Danny: Bless you
Melina: You got it dud.
Michelle: I told you it's you got it DUDE!
Melina: Duuuude...
(D.J and Sylvio come in)
Sylvio: I had a nice time
DJ: Me too.
Sylvio: Mr. Tanner, I'd like to take a walk with your daughter.
Danny: Sure. Michelle take a walk with Sylvio.
Sylvio: No with D.J...I want to walk around the table with her.
Danny: Oh you want to walk around the table? Hah, well then okay. Fine..take a stroll around the counter if you like.
DJ: Thanks dad...we'll be right back...
(They start walking around the table)
DJ: This is really sweet...and totally weird!
(papouli, Stephanie, and Yayagina enter)
Elena: Jesse! Do you remember this?
Jesse: Hey yeah...didn't you and I do this at Pompadoris?
Elena: Yes! I was hoping you'd remember!
(She hugs Jesse, and Becky slams the iron down)
Becky: That's it! Get your Pompadorian hands OFF of my boyfriend!
Elena: But Jesse is my husband.
Sylvio: And now D.J is my wife.
D.J and Jesse: Woah Baby!
Danny: Wait wait...D.J and Sylvio are not married.
Becky: Neither are they!
Papouli: According to Pompadorian traditions, they are. They joined hands, walked around the table, and that's what it's all about!
Danny: No that's called the hokey pokey.
Becky: Jess, is this really someone you want? Someone who cooks and cleans for you? Only living to fulfill your every need and want?
Jesse: Gosh you make it sound so negative.
Becky: Well fine! She's all yours!
(Becky leaves)
Jesse: No wait! Becky!
(Jesse leaves)
Michelle: You're in big trouble mister!
Stephanie: (Yelling) When should I tell your wife you'll be back?
Danny: Okay I want D.J and Sylvio in the living room now!
Joey: "Bah-Bah-Buh-Buh-BUH! Let's meet our first newlywed couple. She's in the eighth grade-He's in the olive business. They've been married for...two and a half minutes. Here's DJ and Silvio Panalakis!"
(D.J Sylvio, and Danny start to leave as Joey throws rice)
Joey: "Let's show our couple what they've won, Bob. A new dining room set..."
Joey: I love weddings!

(In the living room, we find Danny and D.J and Sylvio)
Danny: D.J, why don't you go upstairs and wait for daddy.
DJ: Daddy. With all respect, you can't send me to my room now. I'm a married woman.
Danny: No you're not.
Sylvio: Pompa!
Danny: Please don't call me that!
Sylvio: What is it you do?
Danny: I have my own talk show.
Sylvio: I will study hard...and when you die, I will take over the family business.
Danny: I will never die! Sylvio walk with me talk with me..as I tell you a little something we have here in America called a restraining order...

(At A Greek party. Danny, Papouli, and Jesse are dancing. Then Jesse hugs Elena as Becky walks in)
Becky: Oh this is a pretty picture! I thought I'd come down here to see if you'd apologize, but I see you're too busy hugging your wife! How could you do this to me!?
(She throws a plate)
Becky: Bye!
Joey: Now this is a greek party! Opa!
(Everyone says "Opa" and throws a plate. Danny starts picking up the shattered pieces.)
Jesse: Becky! Wait!
(He and Elena run to Becky in the waiting room)
Jesse: Becky..I have to say something. Elena..you're an amazing woman, with a lot of passion and fire...
Becky: Oh, I'm glad I stuck around for this.
Jesse: No you're going to like this part... But there's no future for us. Because I'm madly in love with Becky.
(He turns to Becky)
Jesse: Becky, I'm madly in love with you.
Becky: Aw Jess, I'm sorry I got into a jealous rage. Just the thought of losing you made me crazy.
Jesse: You're never gonna lose me. Elena, I'm sorry.
Elena: No, it's okay. Now I realize we can only be friends. Too bad we're still married!

(Back to the party, they're all dancing and Danny grabs D.J and Sylvio)
Danny: Oh look we lost the crowd. While we're here let's talk divorce.
DJ: Sylvio I'll never forget you. Afterall, you were my first husband.
Sylvio: For 1 hour, I was married to the most beautiful woman in the world.
DJ: Aw Dad! Do I have to!?
Danny: Oh yeah.
Papouli: Who wants a divorce?
Becky and Danny: They do!
Papouli: Alright, anyone who wants a divorce follow me. Now, hold hands and walk around the table backwards!
Danny: Backwards?
Papouli: Do it!
(They start walking backwards)
Joey: Strange Pompadorian rituals, on the next Geraldo.
Papouli: I now pronounce you husband, and ex-wife!
Elena: We came all the way to America to get divorces.
Sylvio: We should've gone to Disneyland!
Papouli: You know, all this talk of divorce makes me think how lucky I am to have my Gina. And to think she didn't even want to kiss me at first!
Gina: You had a beard! It was like kissing a goat!
Papouli: No, no I kissed a goat once it was very different. Anyways, I shaved...and I got 50 wonderful years with my Gina. I love you.
Gina: Oh I love you too!
(They kiss)
Becky: Aw Jess, isn't that beautiful?
Jesse: That could be me and you someday.
Becky: I hope it will be.
Jesse: You know my feeling is, if you love someone, why wait?
Becky: Well...what are you waiting for?
Jesse: Are you serious!? You really mean it?
Becky: Yes!
(Jesse gets on his knee)
Jesse: Rebecca... wait a minute! Last time we did this you left me at the altar.
Becky: Jesse last time we were in Nevada you said let's get married. This time we'll have time to plan a real wedding.
(Jesse gets on his knee again)
Becky: Wait! You don't have any other wives, in any other countries right?
Jesse: No...
Becky: Okay! You were saying?
Jesse: Will you walk aroung the table with me?
Becky: Yes!
Jesse: Wooohoo! Ladies and gentlemen, I have an announcement! Rebecca Donaldson and Jesse Katsopolis are now engaged to be married!
Stephanie: Again?
Jesse: Yes again!
Danny: Girls isn't this great? Becky and Uncle Jesse are getting married!
Melina and Michelle: You got it dude!
(Everyone starts dancing)

***End ***

Episode Information:

First shown: 1990
Directed by: Joel Zwick
Written by: Jeff Franklin

Guest Cast:
Melina: Mary-Kate Olsen
Gina: (unknown)
Papouli: Jack Kruschen
Elena: Jennifer Gatti
Sylvio: Josh Blake

Script edited by: Amanda
Lay-out: Martin van Dam
Written for: Full House Forever

Released: 01/01/2005